Losing people we love is a difficult, but natural part of life. This loss was particularly difficult for my family, because in every sense, my grandma was the Matriarch of our family, and the impact of her loss was felt by all of us who called her mom, or grandma, or GG.
The thing that will always stand out to me about her is how she took what had been handed her in this life, and she rose above it. She was handed the title orphan at the tender age of 4. She was soon handed the title abuse victim when a man she always referred to as "evil," hurt her as a child and teenage girl in ways she only just hinted at later in life. She was handed the title single mom in an era when divorce wasn't an acceptable escape, no matter how drunk a woman's husband might be.
But, with her three girls as her inspiration to rise above it all, she worked her fingers to the bone to create a better life for her family. She left a horrible situation, and even with financial challenge and difficulty, she created a more stable one for her children.
She had no idea how her strength, and inspiration would impact me, two generations later, when I would have to take those same steps.
I miss my grandma terribly, but, her whole family is very aware that she sacrificed her life to give life to us all. We are none of us without problems, but we live with normal problems, and like the example she gave us, we work our fingers to the bone to rise above them. Thankfully, the challenges we face pale in comparison to those that she endured.
My grandma passed away four years ago, but she passed out of this life, and into another that is blissfully free of the demons that haunted her here. As her family, we can all smile knowing that she has finally found peace, and for once, she can finally relax! Something none of us in this world were ever able to get her to do here.
Starting Monday, I will be featuring a weekly column from a guest columnist, Tracey Hallberg, called Stolen Innocence -- Rising Above the Ashes. Like my grandma, Tracey has had to live with horrors beyond anything most of us will ever know. But, unlike my grandma, Tracey was raised in a generation that has given her something my grandma's generation would never give her: A Voice.
With that voice, Tracey blows the whistle on chemical dependence, mental illness, pediphilia, and incest. Her story is raw, and difficult, and all too familiar for far to many of us. Shining light on it gives Tracey a power over her demons that my grandma never fully knew. My grandma worked them away. Tracey exposes them away.
Her posts are not suitable for young children, and have a PG-13 rating. They contain images and language that might offend some. But, they contain so much help, and so much healing, and since her story is so close to home for me, I want to offer it so that it can help some on a level my story couldn't even touch. Unfortunately, there are many who can relate to Tracey's story. Like, my grandma.
OK. Back to my grandma. My family is really remembering her today, reminiscing with each other so many wonderful memories. We all love it, that in spite of it all, she never stopped laughing. In her own way, she too rose above her own ashes. She had the best laugh. The memory of it makes us all smile.
What joy it is, to take life and run with it. We can choose to run away from it, but why do that, when there is so much to gain from just living it, learning from it, and running freely?
We celebrate that today. Running freely with this thing we call life. My grandma. Tracey. All of us.
No comments:
Post a Comment